bombshelled | Metaheroes inbox

Some jackass posted up a bunch of bullshit traditions for this holiday a few days ago and one of them is burning a tree. To 'welcome the new year' and ward bad luck or whatever.

Not a real tradition, I'm sure. But they insisted it should be done with new friends you've made and not to be pathetic or anything but you're like, the closest I have to one right now.

So how about it, Boom Boom? Burn a dead tree with me?

Still not a fan of the nickname...

But, yeah. Sure. Why not? Could be fun.

Cool. Do you want to do it on New Years Eve or a couple days before? I've got a tree, but I gotta find a place to burn it where we won't get in trouble. And won't be difficult to get to. For you.

It really sucks I didn't get the ability to take people along when I teleport.

I don't have any New Years Eve plans. We can do it then.

OK, yeah, that's another thing. What the fuck are your powers, anyway? I feel like you can just do all kinds of weird ninja shit.

Wrong country and genre.

It's mostly xianxia-style cultivation plus the stuff I the whole transmigration into this world gave me. Hold on. Let me see if I can find a western reference.

Okay. Let me know if this makes sense:

'That Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon Shit'

Oh, okay. So like sword fights on rooftops and shit. I got you.

By the way, do you celebrate Christmas in whatever China you come from? I'm guessing you don't celebrate Hanukkah.

Not where I came from. And in China it's like... A lover's holiday? Mostly brought over for an excuse to have another holiday to sell shit for.

I'm not Jewish. Are you?

Oh, okay. Does that mean you don't want a present?

I am Jewish, yeah. Not super religious about it or anything; I basically only observe the major holidays, but it sucks because most of the time, schools don't give you the day off for stuff like Rosh Hashanah and shit.

What? Of course I want a present! Happy Christmas and Jolly Ho Ho Ho!

Do you want to observe the uh, Hanukkah? weird spelling

LOL way to give in to consumerism, nerd.

TBH, Hebrew uses a whole different alphabet so there's not really one way to spell that shit in English. I bet it's probably the same with Chinese?

But celebrating Hanukkah is fun. You basically just light candles and eat latkes, which are these fried potato pancakes. They're delicious, I'll make you some.

Yeah probably. Idk how it's handled in this world. Heck, for English i'm mostly letting spell check do it's thing.

That sounds good. You bring the pancakes and I'll bring the tree and we can light the tree up instead of candles, yeah?

[Yeah, he really doesn't know anything about Hanukkah.]

Well, spell check's not fucking you over so far!

[ Eh... He's got the spirit. ]

Sounds like a plan.

Yeah I'm surprised! I remember this being a lot more frustrating but it's been so long since I had to deal with it I'm not sure if it actually was or if my memories are just exaggerating it.

Edited 2022-12-17 00:13 (UTC)

Is this not your first time in America? Or somewhere where they speak English?

In America or a version of it, yeah.

But English was a required second language so... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Man, the American school system sucks. I can barely struggle my way through two sentences in Spanish.

I can teach you Chinese if you want. But if you're just complaining to complain, don't let me stop you.

Really? I mean, yeah, I was kind of complaining just to complain but I do actually think learning another language would be cool.

I'm not that great a student, though. Fair warning.

I'm not necessarily a great teacher, but you wouldn't be the first kid I've had to teach reading and writing to.

[Not that he's personally done it for close to a decade now...]

We can talk about after the new year. I'll DM you when I find a place to set things on fire.

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